The Father of the Wired Lady

Welcome Wireless Parents!

The parents are in town and you know what that means...the dreaded question, "So...when are you getting your braces off??

They have only been here for approximately 24 hours and I have already gotten the question at least twice.

"You said you were hoping for Christmas, is that going to happen?"

As if the third tequila shot didn't answer this questions...

"No, Mother. Not so much. Get ready for me, yet again, destroying the family Christmas card."

This is NOT for Beautification

What I hate...when people automatically think I have braces to "beautiful my life."

Are you kidding me?! No way would I strap the metal cages on my mouth for 1.5 years (and counting, ugh) for...'beauty.'

Um no...the braces were only an 'accessory' to the major overhaul called jaw surgery, as to prevent a life of pain and misery.

Just had to get that off my chest! Thanks.

I get my hair done to beautify. I put makeup to beautify. I have a rubber band binding one side of my mouth to...well, lose friends.

ps -- why the one side?! really not so sure. apparently one tooth is too high...blah.

WTF?!

The result of my ortho appointment on Tuesday.

All I can say is....

Oh.

Hell.

No.

Upon demanding clarification from the dental assistant I said, "The doc said just at nighttime, right?

DA: "If she wanted it only at night, she would have said."

WL: "Oh. No. I demand confirmation on this."

DA: "Ok." [Goes to ask]

Doctor: "I am only trying to help you get these off sooner than later. I want you wearing all the time."

WL: "Kill me now."

Help! Deep Cleaning Tips Needed

Ok...so as many times as I tell myself (on the blog) I will do better with my flossing, brushing, over-hauling, etc....I have not been good.

And now I realized, (eeek!), I have an ortho appointment on Tuesday. Normally, I would be highly excited about this. However, this time...not so much. I am freaking because the teeth are looking (I will say it)...nasty. I will 'come clean' -- no pun intended.

Sooooo, anyone have any last-minute-before-the-ortho cleaning tips? The Listerine is not kickin' it as well as it used to.

Help!

Rice is Evil

For lunch today I was treated to sushi.

I love sushi but sushi does not love me.

I hereby declare -- wires against white rice!

Beware. Tastes so good but looks so bad.

No amount of water refills was going to save this socially awkward situation

Ortho Blogger To Represent!

I'm pumped to announce I will be heading back to Blog World this year -- for work, of course -- but REALLY to represent the ortho bloggers!!! Holla with ya braces!

Anyone else planning to attend? Hello ortho cocktail hour!?! Ha. (really not kidding)